Today we conclude our brief series on the search for wisdom through a few passages from the book of Proverbs. Recall some of the points we’ve made along the way. First of all, wisdom is defined as "knowledge applied." Wisdom is action. One may acquire lots of knowledge, but if not applied in a positive way to life, it’s not very helpful. Secondly, all of us will live by some type of "proverbs." The question is, what kind? Will our guidelines for life reflect a Godly, Biblical standard, or will they reflect a worldly, self-centered standard?

Just for fun, here are a few "proverbs" I’ve come across that probably reflect neither a Godly nor a worldly standard:

Actually, that last one—Experience is something you don’t get until just after you need it—strikes close to the theme for our Proverb today. That Proverb—which is our Scripture reading for today…just one verse—says this, "Gray hair is a crown of splendor; it is attained by a righteous life," (Proverbs 16:31).

Throughout the Wisdom Literature of the Bible—specifically, the books of Job, Psalms, Proverbs and Ecclesiastes—gray hair and the long life of reflected experiences is valued. Ecclesiastes, for example, is the author’s seasoned reflective observations on the meaning of life as his life draws near its end. The value of the book of Job is the lessons learned through the experiences of difficulties that come. The Psalms often reflect the growth in faith that develops in our journey with God. The psalmist, for example, comes to understand the Lord as his shepherd because of the experience of being led to green pastures and still waters, led even through the valley of the shadow of death. Our Proverb for today—and others like it—point to the wisdom acquired in a long life.

All of us can readily acknowledge that experience is a great teacher, albeit the first lesson of experience comes after we need it. But if we learn from those experiences, don’t repeat mistakes and help others learn from our experiences, then gray hair can be a crown of splendor indeed. Kim and I in our 32 years of marriage, have frequently bemoaned to one another about life seemingly being a "trial and error" process. Surely that has been a part of your experience also.

That was the experience of Professor David Gushee. David Gushee is professor of moral philosophy at Union University in Jackson, Tennessee. He has written a book entitled Only Human in which he wrote about what makes up our human experience and our connection to others. In the first part of this year, however, Professor Gushee began to experience what he had written about. His daughter, Holly, was involved in an automobile accident in which she suffered serious injuries, including a serious brain injury. In an article in Christianity Today, Professor Gushee describes how this experience brought home what he had written regarding our connection to other humans. "Everything changed for our family that night," he writes, "as we were involuntarily ushered into a new community of those whose family members have experienced catastrophic injuries." Then, upon reflecting on that experience over against what he had previously written, Professor Gushee continued, " My most recent book was about human nature. But I must say that I learned more about human nature in one month than in all prior months combined. Many things I said in the book took on a whole new meaning. A wise friend called this the difference between knowledge and experience. In Only Human, I emphasized how deep and mysterious the interconnections are between people, and how sacred is human life. I had no idea how true that was until I saw my Holly in the ER, sat by her bedside, and wondered whether she would ever wake up. The experience of the "near-miss," of getting her back as if from the dead, awakened me to her immeasurable value, and by extension (because everyone is someone's child, and all are made in God's image) to the immeasurable value of every human being. I knew that. Now I know it. (Emphasis his)

All of us have experiences in life that bring greater understanding, dare I say wisdom, to life. What before we lived in theory—a kind of trial and error—we now live out of our experience. Hopefully, we’ve all learned from those trials and errors and can pass those lessons learned along to our children, our grandchildren, our friends and church family. In a survey asking people what taught them the most about personal money management, while 5% answered "unsure," and 31% answered "school," (I’m assuming that includes workshops and seminars), the majority, 64%, answered "mistakes."

Although the first lesson arrives too late, experience is a valuable teacher IF we apply the lessons learned from it to similar situations that develop in the future. In that, in the application of the knowledge acquired through experience, comes wisdom. And in our sharing with others the lessons learned from our experience, we can bring valuable wisdom to them as well.

A word of caution here, however. The value of that experience only comes if it connects us and others to Godly standards. Remember, we will live by proverbs, just what kind. We can gain experience, for example, in areas and applications of life that fall outside the standards God sets for us. In no way would the writers of Wisdom Literature in the Bible identify that experience as wisdom. Rather, it would be folly. One could, I suppose, acquire much experience in how to successfully rob a bank—to use an extreme example. One could also, to cite perhaps a more relevant example, develop lots of experience at manipulating people in order to get his or her way. Would the authors of Wisdom Literature identify that experience as wisdom, as the "crown of splendor" that is a gray head? I think not. Not all experiences in life lead to wisdom. They may lead to gray hairs, but not necessarily wisdom from a Godly perspective.

So, for our experiences to result in wisdom, for our gray hairs to be a crown of splendor, let me suggest a few qualifiers.

One, I’ve already mentioned—our experience and the lessons learned from it must connect us to the standards of our faith. Experience that falls outside the standards of our faith does not lead to wisdom, but folly.

Second, we must answer the question, have I really prayed about it? Enduring through the experiences of a Job, we must pray our way through it. Worry is not prayer. Concern that weighs heavy on our hearts and minds, keeping us awake at night is not prayer. Prayer is focused, intentional conversation time with God. We give expression to our worries and concerns. We confess our weaknesses, we profess our faith, and we listen for the prompting of God’s Spirit. Before we approach someone going through a difficult time with whom we might want to share the benefit of our experience through a similar situation—and who might very well benefit from our experience—we must pray about it. The forced wisdom of our experience falls on deaf ears. Before offering our opinion, before giving advice, before sharing the wisdom of our experience, be sure the answer to the question, Have I really prayed about it?, is an unqualified "yes!" Enduring through a difficult experience and offering the wisdom learned through that experience requires an affirmative "yes" to the question, Have I really prayed about it?

Then, finally, for the voice of our experience to be true wisdom, we must examine whether the wisdom we offer will benefit others, or is it simply for our own gain? Wisdom propounded for the benefit of the speaker only is bombastic and pretentious. The movement toward self-promotion and self interest pushes such supposed wisdom outside the standards of our faith and is, therefore, not wisdom but folly.

So in giving voice to the lessons learned from our years of experience, we must insure that such lessons fall within the standards of our faith, that we have really prayed about it before sharing it with someone else, and others will benefit from it before we can call it truly wisdom. Our proverb for today helps point us in the right direction. "Gray hair is a crown of splendor; it is attained by a righteous life," (Proverbs 16:31). Note it does not say that gray hairs alone are a crown of splendor. Rather, gray hairs are a crown of splendor…when attained by a righteous life.