Today, the fifth in a six part series on the 6 Marks of Discipleship, particularly as they serve as the foundation for a collective group of disciples known as the church seeking to be the church God wants them to be.  To “know God’s plan for us” as the church known as Shepherd of the Hills Presbyterian Church in Lakewood, Colorado, we must be actively seeking God through the disciplines of these 6 Marks of Discipleship.  They are essential for us to grow as individual disciples, but also they are essential for us to grow as a church.  The response to all the questions about life, for you and me as individuals—what kind of work am I to do, am I to marry, whom should I marry, what do I do about this challenging issue with a friend—and for us as a church—how do we move into the future, what ministries and missions do we offer and support—all of the answers to the questions we face in life begin to be found by earnestly seeking God through the essential practices of the 6 Marks of Discipleship: 1) Pray daily, 2) Corporate worship weekly, 3) Read the Bible regularly, 4) Serve at and beyond Shepherd of the Hills, 5), today’s topic—Be in relationships to encourage spiritual growth in others and in ourselves, and 6) Give of my time, talents and resources.  There’s a part of me, when someone comes to my office with a problem or challenge they are facing in life, to ask them, “How are you doing at the 6 Marks of Discipleship?  Let’s begin there.”  On the one hand, that probably wouldn’t be very pastoral of me.  On the other hand, it might be the most pastoral thing I could do.  You want answers or direction in life?  Start here.  By the way, that sixth mark, “give of my time, talents and resources” is the topic for next week’s Consecration Sunday and Whit Dempsey, who grew up in this church, is the son of Stan and Judy Dempsey, and an ordained Presbyterian pastor currently serving as an interim pastor at Mountain View Presbyterian Church in Denver will be our guest preacher, so I hope you’ll be here for that.  For today, however, the fifth mark of discipleship, being in relationships to encourage spiritual growth in others and in ourselves.  Our Scripture reading is 1 Thessalonians 5:8-18.  (Read)

As I look back over my spiritual journey there is one common denominator I would point to as pivotal in my growth as a follower of Jesus Christ.  Small groups.  As a youth growing up in a Lutheran church in Denver it was the small group of my confirmation class and youth group.  I can’t say we were always well-focused on the good news of Jesus Christ, but the shared experiences of that group are what stands out in my memory of my spiritual journey at that time.  Several of the relationships established there remain to this day.  After college when I reviewed and renewed my commitment to Jesus Christ as Savior and Lord of my life it was a couples’ Bible study that shaped and formed mine—and Kim’s—spiritual growth.  Those relationships remain important today.  Later it became the small group experience of the Navigators’ 2:7 series—a “design for discipleship” that incorporated serious study and application of these 6 Marks of Discipleship.  If I were to point to one thing that led me to hear and answer God’s call to seminary it would be that small group experience.  I suspect that would be Kim’s answer also in her understanding my call to go to seminary and agreeing to pack up our three children and move to Austin, Texas!  In all the frenetic activity of seminary, what stands out is the small group experience of our study group—four of us forming a study group and the four of us, along with our wives and kids, fast becoming friends.  Those relationships remain important today.  Last year’s Guest Leader for our Consecration Sunday, Arch Baker, was one member of that study group.  Even as a pastor in the churches I’ve served and all the activity and relationships connected to that, one thing that stands out in all of those churches are the small groups in which I was involved—and not so much as a pastor, although it’s impossible to totally shed that identity, but as much as possible just another participant in the group.  In our couples group in Greeley, one of the participants was a pastor in a congregational church in Greeley.  He loved our group because none of us were his parishioners.  He felt like just another participant in the group.  I’m part of two small groups now.  One is a group of ten PCUSA pastors in Colorado.  We meet quarterly, spending a 24 hour overnight stay in Frisco.  I value that group more than I can express.  The other is a group of four couples who meet for dinner and Bible study.  We also meet quarterly and I deeply value that group.  When I look back at my spiritual journey, what stands out in whatever growth I’ve experienced as a follower of Jesus Christ are the small groups I’ve been a part of and the relationships developed in those groups.

So, it should come as no surprise to you that I highly recommend discipleship mark number five to you: Be in relationships to encourage spiritual growth in others and in yourself.  And I strongly suggest to you that one avenue for being in relationships is an intentional small group experience with a Christian focus.  One pathway for that can be the small group experience we offer at Shepherd—Disciple, which is an intentional Bible experience of study, discussion and application; and Companions in Christ, a part of The Upper Room ministries and an intentional discipleship journey of discussion and application around a variety of Christian themes such as grace, forgiveness and transformation.  I strongly encourage you to explore being part of a small group experience with Disciple or Companions in Christ, and Barbara will be at a table in the Welcome Center following worship for you to ask questions, explore, and hopefully express interest in being part of or forming a small group with Disciple or Companions in Christ as a guiding resource for you.

However, you don’t have to use those resources.  There are hundreds of resources out there to guide you and a group of others in a shared discipleship journey.  Our small group here uses the Serendipity Bible for Bible study and discussion.  It leads you through a series of questions about any passage in the Bible—opening questions, digging deeper questions, and application questions.  For example, from our 1 Thessalonians passage for today, the Serendipity Bible asks such questions as: (Opening) “What causes you to ‘blow a gasket?’ Traffic jams? Bickering children? Or what?” (Dig deeper) “Reading between the lines, what do you think are the problems in this church? Would you call these problems serious or normal?” And (Application) Of the various challenges in this passage, which one would you choose to work on this week?” (Interactive Study Bible: Copyright 2001 by Serendipity House)  There are tons of resources out there.  Not knowing what to use, or study, or talk about is not an acceptable excuse for not being in a small group.

The biggest hindrance to being in a small group is probably time.  We don’t have “time” for a small group.  To be honest with you, that’s an issue for me.  That’s an issue for our society today.  The couples group we met with in Greeley in the late 70’s and early 80’s met weekly.  Our small group in Hastings met monthly.  Our groups in Amarillo and here now in Denver meet quarterly.  And finding a good date on everyone’s calendar is a challenge.  It’s the particular sickness of our society today—not enough time.  Which is ironic to me because of all the technology—computers, internet, smart phones—which were supposed to make us more productive and efficient with our time.  Ironic, and sad.  Nonetheless, I want to encourage you to carve out whatever time you can—whether it’s weekly, monthly, or quarterly—to get involved in the spiritually building relationships of a small group.

Here’s why.  Here’s what happens in small groups: Acceptance.  Accountability.  Acceleration.  Application.  Notice I was going for some “A” alliteration there!

First, acceptance.  Everybody wants to be accepted in one way or another.  The commitment to a small group experience together says, “You’re welcome here.  You’re valued here.  You’re accepted here.”  You’re a part of something shared in a small group...and that’s a wonderful feeling.

Acceptance doesn’t mean condoning every behavior.  Because there is also accountability in the best small groups.  When my PCUSA pastors group meets we spend much of the time on accountability issues—reviewing something that came up in our last meeting, or responding to provocative questions about our ministry and our lives in general.  One such question that comes to mind was this: “If you were to totally blow it in your ministry, in what area of temptation would you fail?”  And that led to frank and honest conversation about areas of sexual temptations, or financial temptations, or anger temptations.  More than that, much more than that, there was a commitment to pray about that for each other, to periodically check in with each other, to hold each other accountable to not stray into those areas of temptation.  And we’ve had wonderful follow up conversations around that.  There is acceptance in a small group.  But there is also accountability.  Don’t you love the quote on today’s bulletin?  Trying to grow spiritually without hearing the truth about yourself from somebody else is like trying to do brain surgery on yourself without a mirror” (John Ortberg).  Bad enough to decide to do brain surgery on yourself, but to do that without a mirror?  That would be crazy.  And trying to grow spiritually without the accountability of hearing the truth about yourself from somebody else is just as crazy.  Acceptance.  But also accountability.

Then there is, or should be, acceleration.  Growth.  Moving forward in what it means to be a follower of Jesus Christ.  I am not the same follower of Christ that I was 35 years ago in our couples Bible study.  There are lots of reasons for that, but the influence of my small group experiences have been most significant in moving me forward in my faith.  There is acceleration in our understanding and living out what it means to be a disciple, and a church, especially influenced by the relationships of a small group experience.

Acceleration occurs because of the acceptance and accountability we get in small groups.  It also occurs because we are applying to our lives the principles of faith we learn in our small groups.  Without application it’s just head knowledge.  With application it becomes heart knowledge as well.  We don’t grow as a disciple unless we are applying the principles of Christian faith to our lives.

One more word about application.  The relationships we build in order to encourage spiritual growth in others and in ourselves occur in a variety of places.  Small groups of intentional study, discussion and application of the principles of Christian faith are one very important place.  Of supreme importance.  However, relationship building for the encouragement of spiritual growth in others and in ourselves also must take place, be applied, in more subtle and informal places.  Our neighborhoods.  Our workplaces.  Our areas of service beyond Shepherd of the Hills.  What has the missional journey been encouraging you to do?  “Establish relationships.  Listen to their stories.  Pray for discernment from the Holy Spirit about appropriate next steps to take in those relationships.”  It rightly could be said that we haven’t begun living the Christian faith until we are living it in the relationships we have in life.  Every relationship.  Because God cares about each and every person He brings across your path...just as He cares about you. 

Want to grow in your faith?  Mark of discipleship number five: Be in relationships with others to encourage spiritual growth in them...and in yourself.